Especially in the third stage of Dynamic I feel as if I am going to die! Do I really have to do it to the point of complete and utter exhaustion?
Whenever you are total a revolution takes place; a transformation begins in your life.
It is then that you reach the boiling point; and only at the boiling point does the water turn into steam. Then you cannot flow downward like water; you can only rise upwards like vapor. Then your direction is not downwards, it is upwards.
You have to drop laziness.
People come to me and say that the morning meditation is a bit difficult. Six o'clock is too early. You do not understand what you are saying.
If getting up at six in the morning is difficult, it will be much more difficult and painful to step outside the mind.
If getting up at six in the morning is so difficult, how will you jump out of the wheel of life? If you are not even prepared to drop the small habit of sleeping late... for a day or two you may feel lazy. But you allow laziness to win over you. It shows that you value your laziness more than meditation.
Somebody comes and complains that the four meditations you do during the camp are too tiring: "Why can't we only do two each day?" But then, why do two? Forget about all four! If four meditations tire you, two will half tire you, but you are bound to get tired. And I know if I say that two will be all right, you will promptly return with the request to do only one...because it is the same mind up to its old tricks. Even two meditations will make you feel tired to some extent. If this is the way you approach things then you will eventually become more and more lazy.
Effort is required for everything.
Remember, life is effort; death is rest.
If you want to be dead you need do nothing.
If you want to live you will have to do something. If you want to live life to the fullest you will have to make a great effort.
If you want to attain the divine such small bits of efforts will not do. Your whole life should turn into one gigantic effort. You must stake everything that you have. If you hold back even a little bit of yourself, then you will miss. You have to stake yourself totally; only then will you be saved.
That is why so few attain. The reason is nothing but laziness.
While doing the active meditations you are so very careful not to hurt yourself or fall on somebody or tire yourself.
Why do it all? Who asked you to do it?
You are not clear within yourself, and that is the trouble. You live in a haze where everything is foggy and misty. You are not even clear as to how you came here and why. Somebody was coming and you just came along with him...just to look at what was going on.
You have been pushed and pulled about like this for infinite lives, but you will never reach your destination this way. You will never get there by blind chance. You will not reach the destination accidentally. It requires a well-directed effort. You reach the destination when all the currents in your life flow in one direction. Destination is your concentrated will power. As soon as you are fully resolved, your energy accumulates at one point and your mind flows in a single stream. This energy within you is unbounded. So if you feel that you do not have sufficient energy, you will get tired very soon, you are mistaken.
There are three layers of energy in your body.
The uppermost layer is for day-to-day living; it is like the small change you carry in your pocket. It is not all the money you have. It is just the pocket money you use for minor expenses.
You use this for sitting, standing, walking, eating, sleeping and other light jobs. This is your superficial energy, the small change in your purse. When you start meditating, this energy is used up in no time at all, because you are not accustomed to using it for meditation; this is a new activity. Now, if you let this exhaustion govern you and you stop meditating you will never be able to enter deeply into meditation. Take no notice of your fatigue.
If you continue you will find that your persistence has tapped the energy that lies at the second level.
You have often experienced this phenomenon. For example you are about to go to bed at night. You are overcome with weariness, so sleepy that you can barely keep your eyes open. Suddenly there is an alarm: your house has caught fire! Can you sleep after that? Do you say, "I am sleepy?" Your sleep vanishes totally. Sleep is the last thing on your mind! Where has all this energy come from? What happened? You have broken through to your second layer of energy, which is not a layer of your daily routine. That layer breaks down. Now this flood of newly released energy makes sleep impossible.
If you persist in your meditation without giving up, you will discover a second source of energy available to you before very long. Once you have this energy at your disposal, then no matter how much you meditate your body will never become tired. You will have something inexhaustible. This is the second layer.
There is also a third layer of energy.
This second source of energy is your treasure. It can be consumed, though not as easily as the first. If you keep on making effort, ceaselessly, this source of energy will also dry up, and the third layer will break loose. This third source does not belong to you; it belongs to the divine, and it never dries up. If you become lazy, however, you will not reach the second, let alone the third. The divine is the supreme energy hidden in you.
The first layer is that of your mind; the second is that of your soul; the third is of the divine.
Exhaust the mind and you attain the energy of the soul.
Exhaust the soul and you attain the energy of the divine, which is eternal and inexhaustible. Then you are one with the whole. You have to keep on trying until the third level of energy is reached, and you obtain the supreme power. Then you are a siddha, one who has arrived. Then you can relax.
Before that, any relaxation is suicidal.
Osho: "The Great Path"
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